


Fate, Serendipity, and Other Nonsense

by Hawkeye_918



Category: Team Fortress 2
Genre: (sort of), Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Speeding Bullet (Team Fortress 2), Team as Family, oblivious idiots in love, this story is chock full of cheesy romcom tropes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-28
Updated: 2019-05-20
Packaged: 2020-02-08 15:52:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18626389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hawkeye_918/pseuds/Hawkeye_918
Summary: Sniper and Scout are perfectly happy being just friends (at least they tell themselves that). They have no plans to change this.The universe seems to have other ideas.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> whoop whoop i'm back with another story! just a warning: this story is going to be extremely cheesy and pretty sappy, too. I hope y'all enjoy this cavity inducing fic!

Sunday was shopping day, when Engie made the supply runs into town. Originally, he made the trips all by himself, and asked the other team members to make lists of what they wanted. But someone would always forget something or forget to make a list at all, and Engie would become annoyed. He let it slide for a while, but last week, there came a breaking point.

 

“Did you get my orange jello?” Soldier had asked.

 

“No, ‘cause it wasn’t on your list”, Engie replied. 

 

“Were they out of orange jello? I would have liked some.”

 

And the conversation proceeded to go in a circle.

 

So Engie made a rule, that if anyone wanted something outside the usual provisions from the store, they would have to come along for the trip.

 

This had lead to Engie driving the van, Medic in the passenger seat (he had called shotgun), and everyone else (with the exception of Spy, who refused to come along) crammed into the back of the van, the tight space filled with the mixed cacophony of loud laughter and loud arguing.

 

It was akin to chaperoning a middle school field trip.

 

Once in the grocery store, everyone went their separate ways, occasionally sprinting back to the cart Engie pushed to put their goodies inside.

 

Demo raced by, pushing Scout in an otherwise empty shopping cart. “Let’s go get some frickin’ potato chips!” Scout announced, pointing the way.

 

“WHOO!”, Demo shouted, shoving the cart forward. From an aisle away, a muffled crash.

 

Sniper silently approached Engie’s cart, inadvertently startling the hell out of the other man. Sniper put a few chocolate bars into the cart and turned to leave, when Engie spoke. 

 

“That much sugar can’t be healthy for ya, Stretch”, he chided goodnaturedly. 

 

“My whole life is unhealthy, mate”, Sniper joked, taking a couple bags of instant coffee off the shelf and depositing them in the cart.

 

Pyro took advantage of the distraction to sneak three king size bags of marshmallows in with the coffee.

 

As the shopping trip progressed, the team had two carts nearly overflowing with goodies. A dozen cans of tomato soup (for Soldier), a party sized bag of Doritos (for Scout), a disconcerting amount of deli meat (for Heavy), and two 30 packs of beer (for everyone) were among some of the purchases.

 

At the register, a weary young woman rang up the items while an equally tired young man bagged them. 

 

It took a long time to process everything, but thankfully there was no one behind the team in that particular line. The young woman finished punching in all the codes and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear.

 

“That’ll be $71.43”, she said, glancing up to look at the group before her for the first time.

 

Her eyes flickered from one merc to the next. An assortment of eight men, no two of them dressed like they were going to the same event, from the one in the gas mask to the one built like a refrigerator. She blinked slowly.

 

The cashier had exactly one question. 

 

“Will that be cash or credit?”, she asked, deadpan. 

 

Engie payed with the company credit card the Administrator had given him for the express purpose of running such errands.

 

Some very careful maneuvering was required indeed to stuff everyone and the groceries into the back of the van, resulting in everything being about fifty times more cramped than it had been during the initial drive to the store. 

 

Demo was using a loaf of bread as a pillow and was napping soundly, while Soldier and Pyro were engaged in a rousing game of I Spy. Heavy and Medic were discussing something boring about books. Sniper was attempting to tune everyone out entirely.

 

“Yo, Hardhat, what’s that up there?” Scout called, pointing to a small building on the side of the road. They were taking a different route home, and he couldn’t recall seeing that place before.

 

Engie squinted to read the distant sign. “It says... ‘Clear Mind Psychic Readings’.”

 

“Let’s go in, c’mon guys! I’m goin’ crazy back here!” Scout said, jiggling his leg. 

 

“We’re not stoppin’.” Engie replied, an air of finality in his tone.

 

Scout took a deep breath. “Please please please please please please please please please please please please--” 

 

“Alright!” Engie cut in, sighing in defeat. He figured maybe it would be a good thing to let the kid blow off some steam.

 

There was no parking lot for the building, and being the only thing around for a mile or so, it was perfectly fine to just park directly in front. There was only one other car there, anyway.

 

“You have five minutes, y’hear me?” Engie said, turning in his seat and pointing a finger at Scout.

 

Scout nodded excitedly and scrambled over his teammates and out of the van. 

 

“Anyone else?” Engie asked, raising an eyebrow. 

 

“Aw, what the hell”, Sniper shrugged. “Why not.” He carefully exited the vehicle. 

 

“Don’t break anythin’!”, Engie called after the pair. 

 

Scout had actually stopped to wait for Sniper in front of the store. “Never woulda suspected you were into this spiritual mumbo-jumbo, Snipes”, Scout teased, grinning.

 

“I’m not. Just wanted to stretch my legs, is all.” Sniper said simply. He never put much stock in the supernatural, but he wouldn’t deny it either. The things he’d seen working for this company made it pretty damn hard to find much of anything implausible.

 

“Eh, fair enough. Same reason I made Hardhat pull over. Frickin’ sucks in that van.”

 

A chime sounded as they entered the little shop, and no sooner had the crossed the threshold than Scout had sprinted to the other side of the store, distracted by some shiny rocks on a shelf. 

 

Approximately ten seconds after Scout left his side, a woman materialized in front of Sniper. She was perhaps in her sixties, and was clad in a flowing floral patterned dress and large dangly earrings. She wore her thick whitish hair in a braid. 

 

“Oh, hello!” She said, smiling warmly. “You’re the first customer I’ve had in days! What’s your name?” 

 

Sniper faltered. “Erm…”, he managed.

 

“That’s alright-- I know it anyway.” She replied, giggling. 

 

Sniper was not sure how he felt about that. “Ma’am, I just wanted to--”

 

“Shh”, she said raising a finger to her lips. “In honor of your first visit to my shop, I’ll give you this reading for free, okay, honey?”

 

Sniper blinked rapidly. “... alright, then.” He was a little uncomfortable, but the almost maternal vibe the woman gave off made him feel just a tad more at ease. He wondered where the hell Scout had gone off to.

 

The woman took Sniper’s hand in hers and began scrutinizing him. She stared into his eyes.

 

“Don’t you need cards or a crystal ball or something?” He asked, perplexed.

 

The woman said nothing, a mirthful twinkle in her eye.

 

After a minute or two of quiet, during which Sniper tried not to sweat bullets, she let go of his hand. 

 

There was something somber yet concerned in her expression. She whispered, “You have been through so, so much in your life. So much pain, so many struggles. I get the feeling, you and those around you; you walk this line between life and death. It’s such a thin line, honey.”

 

“But!” She said, brightening. “You have a very strong spirit, nothing is going to break you, not by a mile. Your resilience is something to be proud of!”

 

That all was pretty spot on, but you wouldn’t have to be psychic to take one look at Sniper and peg him as the ‘strong but silent’ type. “Well, thank you, but I ought to get going.” He said, tipping his hat. There were too many shelves in the way for Sniper to see where Scout had disappeared to. He hadn’t heard a peep from him, which was usually not a good thing. But on the plus side, he hadn’t heard anything break either. 

 

“There’s one more thing, though, before you go.” The woman said, smiling, voice dropping down to a whisper again. “Love is so very close at hand for you. Real, true, love.”

 

Sniper blinked rapidly in disbelief. “All due respect, ma’am, I doubt--”

 

“Hey, Stretch, some check this out!” Scout called suddenly. Judging by the startled look on the woman’s face, it seemed she hadn’t noticed there was someone else in the store. But the shocked expression lingered. Sniper stayed put, he was too taken aback by the psychic’s reaction to move.

 

From behind the shelves and cases, Scout was holding a polished ball of amethyst as though he was about to wind up a pitch. He had no intentions of actually throwing it, but he hoped he could get a laugh out of Sniper. After a moment, when Sniper didn’t come around the corner, Scout called again, “C’mon man, you gotta see this!”. Nothing.

 

Scout put the amethyst back down on the shelf, sighed at the wasted joke opportunity, and walked back to where he’d last seen Sniper.

 

When Scout walked back around the corner and came into view, the woman gasped. “That’s him!”, she said, pointing to Scout.

 

“What?”, Scout and Sniper asked simultaneously, extremely perplexed for entirely different reasons.

 

“Oh”, the woman sighed, smiling and clapping her hands together. “You two are destined to be together. You’re soulmates!”

 

Scout’s eyes bugged out of his head. Sniper looked similarly shocked.

 

No one in the shop had time to process anything before the door chime sounded and Soldier stuck his head through the doorway. “Engie says to hurry up and get back to the van because the ice cream is melting. Also, someone who is not me threw a head of lettuce at Medic and made him  _ very  _ angry!” Soldier barked, and immediately withdrew his head and left.

 

No one said anything, no one moved for the moment.

 

“So, uh…”, Scout began, so many questions on the tip of his tongue.

 

“Yes”, the psychic declared, putting one hand on Scout’s shoulder and the other on Sniper’s. “It’s fate. I don’t recall ever getting a feeling this strong, in all my years… true love…” She beamed, eyes on the verge of watering.

 

Sniper and Scout exchanged bewildered looks. 

 

From outside the shop came the sounds of loud bangs accompanied by some colorful cursing. 

 

Sniper thanked the psychic again, and the two men took their leave.

 

Once they were outside, Scout, face beet red, scoffed and jerked a thumb back towards the shop. “Nice lady. Kinda nuts, though, amiright?” He asked sheepishly.

 

“Yeah”, Sniper agreed, chuckling nervously.

 

They climbed back into the van and the three different arguments inside paused long enough for Engie to yell for everyone to buckle their seatbelts. And they were off.

_ Soulmates _ . Not a word to be used lightly. The sheer weight and implications of the term can be heart-stopping in more ways than one.

 

Sure, Scout and Sniper were good friends. They played cards together, went out for tacos, or just sat around drinking beer and telling stories. They even had a secret handshake. But anything beyond friends? No. Impossible. Maybe when they accidentally brushed hands, they didn’t shy away, nor when they sat too close together and their outer thighs touched. And maybe they had shared some meaningful looks and one of them would lean in a bit and they’d almost… but that didn’t mean anything, right?

 

Scout decided to nap for the rest of the ride home so no one would question his silence.

 

Sniper just stared out the window.

  
  
  


The following morning, the team geared up as usual in the spawn room and prepared for the upcoming battle. 

 

Scout cautiously approached Sniper, careful not to surprise him. The man was more than a little jumpy when it came to people sneaking up on him. 

 

“So, uh, Snipes? I been thinkin’ about what that psychic lady said…”

 

“Yeah?”, Sniper asked warily, turning around to face him. There were a dozen possible ways for Scout to finish that sentence, and it was impossible not to consider all the ways this conversation might go south. 

 

“I think we should just, like, pretend that never happened. Go back to business as usual, y’feel me?” Scout fiddled with his hands and looked off at a far wall.

 

“Alright.” Sniper agreed. This was one of the better outcomes, so why did he feel... disappointed?

 

Scout nodded. “Okay, so as long as we’re cool, you wanna have a movie night? There’s supposed to be this monster movie marathon on later this week.”

 

Sniper smiled. “Fine by me. But you bring the snacks.” He said, pointing a finger at the other man.

 

“Fair enough”, Scout said after a beat of consideration. He scampered off to find where he’d put down his gun.

 

 

* * *

 

  
  


Friday night, Scout came knocking at Sniper’s camper door. 

 

He didn’t wait for Sniper to open the door and instead let himself in. “Hey, man, I got the goods!”, Scout announced, putting a brown bakery box on the table next to the tv set. The tv was just a crappy little portable black-and-white set, but it was better than nothing.

 

“Thanks, mate.” Sniper said, picking up the box and opening it. He took out a cookie and looked at it for a second. It was a heart-shaped sugar cookie with pink sprinkles. The box was full of them. Sniper looked questioningly from the cookie, to Scout, back to the cookie.

 

Scout’s eyes widened in surprise. “I, uh, didn’t… I mean, y’know, just… well, the sign at the store just said ‘clearance cookies’ and I was like ‘yeah, I can afford that!’ and I thought the fact that it was two dozen cookies would be good so I didn’t actually look--”

 

Sniper cut off Scout’s rambling to spare him. “It’s fine. A cookie’s a cookie”, he said nonchalantly, taking a bite.

 

“Yeah, that’s a good point. ‘Sides, I’m starvin’.” Scout laughed, though still red-faced and nervous, sitting down on the sofa (it was more of a loveseat than anything) like he was afraid he might break it. 

 

Sniper turned on the tv and sat down a foot away from Scout, placing the box of cookies between them.

 

The awkward tension dissipated as the first movie wore on, and Scout and Sniper fell into their usual relaxed banter. 

 

It was an awful B movie about a lake monster from outer space, and the ‘monster’ itself was a guy in an awful rubber costume. The writing was atrocious, and anytime an actor spoke a particularly bad line, either Scout or Sniper would repeat the line back in a mocking tone and crack the other up. They also enjoyed making fun of all the continuity errors and low-budget special effects.

 

“Didja get a look at that?” Sniper said, pointing to the screen. 

 

Scout paused mindlessly shoveling cookies into his mouth in order to answer. “Y’mean the zipper on the back of the costume? It’s been buggin’ me the whole movie.” He began crunching on another cookie.

 

“That too, but I was referrin’ to the microphone in the background.” Sniper said, picking up a cookie and taking a bite. Despite being on clearance, the cookies were surprisingly not stale. He finished the cookie and brushed the crumbs off his lap.

 

Scout didn’t have to look very hard to see the boom mic hanging down into the shot. “I don’t know what’s worse-- that, or that one extra who won’t stop lookin’ at the camera.”

 

Sniper chuckled. “Take your pick, the whole damn movie is an insult to the film industry.”

 

Scout laughed and reached for a cookie, only to find the box empty. He chucked it straight into the trash.

 

“I’ll be right back.” Sniper said, standing up and heading to the bathroom to take a piss. 

 

“I’ll tell ya if you miss anythin’ good.” Scout said.

 

“Thanks, but I doubt I will.” Sniper replied, flashing a smile that made Scout a little weak in the knees. Good thing Scout was sitting down. 

 

Sniper returned a minute or two later and just sort of looked out over the room. The sun had long since set and Sniper hadn’t turned on the lamp, what with being preoccupied with the movie and all. The room was nearly pitch black, save for the flickering glow of the tv. Scout was staring at the screen, transfixed, biting the tip of his thumb and… shaking? The chill of the desert night was starting to seep inside the camper, maybe Scout was cold?

 

Sniper sat back down, but not before taking down the blanket he kept on the back of the sofa and draping it around Scout’s shoulders.

 

Scout’s attention snapped away from the movie, and he looked down at the blanket then over at Sniper confusedly. “Huh?”, he asked.

 

“You looked cold.” Sniper shrugged. He studied Scout for a moment and entertained a thought from the back of his mind. “You’re not scared, are ya?” He asked, lightly elbowing Scout in the side. 

 

“Absolutely not.” Scout lied with conviction, though he didn’t fool Sniper for a second.

 

They sat in silence for a good five minutes.

 

Then Scout, subtly, without taking his eyes off the screen, adjusted the blanket so it was around Sniper, too.

 

Sniper smiled.

  
  



	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A trip into town turns into something else entirely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is a lot longer than I planned but I hope you guys like it!

Scout had a problem.

****

Sure, he usually had problems, when he wasn’t the one causing them. But this was a Big Problem.

****

He couldn’t recall exactly when he’d realized he had a crush on Sniper-- several months, maybe almost a whole year? Maybe longer? But that wasn’t the problem. He also had a sneaking little suspicion that maybe, just maybe, Sniper liked him back. That was also not a problem.

****

Getting a crush on such a close friend was really weird, but not _bad_ weird. Scout just became deathly worried about rocking the boat and letting his romantic feelings destroy a perfectly good friendship. Because inevitably, they would, right?

****

That’s how their relationship was, conveniently pretending they weren’t attracted to each other. They never broached the subject, never came close to it. They just went into the same song and dance, going round and round. And it probably could have gone on like this forever.

****

But then this psychic lady had to go and say that stuff about true love and all that and now whatever it was that was going on between Scout and Sniper would have to be acknowledged sooner or later. That was the problem.

****

Fuck.

****

Scout was lying down on the couch in the rec room. “I’m so frickin’ bored”, he sighed for the fiftieth time, closing his comic book and putting it over his face. Normally he’d go bug someone (especially Sniper), but...

****

From the other side of the room, Spy scoffed and shouted, “Then shut up and _do something_ about it so the rest of us can enjoy our day off!”

****

Scout removed the comic book from his face and lifted his head to better make eye contact with Spy. “Wouldja do a jigsaw puzzle with me?” He asked, tone resigned, eyebrow raised.

****

Spy exhaled sharply and flipped the page in his magazine. “I would rather eat salsa with shards of broken glass for my tortilla chips.”

****

“You coulda just said ‘no’ like a normal person, jackass.” Scout mumbled.

****

“But that would not accurately convey my total disinterest in doing a puzzle with you.” Spy said pointedly.

****

Scout sighed again.

****

Medic rolled his eyes. He had been sitting back in the recliner and attempting (key word ‘attempting’) to work on his needlepoint. Heavy had been giving him embroidery lessons and Medic was slowly but surely making progress.

****

Medic gestured with the sewing needle in his hand. “Now, look. You can keep-- oh, hello Sniper. Just the person I wanted to see.”  He cut himself off mid sentence when he noticed Sniper passing by the doorway.

****

Scout perked up noticeably.

****

Confused and intrigued, Sniper entered the rec room. “For something good, I hope?” He asked, eyebrow quirked.

****

“Ja. Why don’t you and Scout go into town? Go to a sock hop, see a movie, whatever the young people do these days.” He waved them off dismissively.

****

Sniper’s confusion deepened. He looked to Scout for some kind of context, but Scout just shrugged. Sniper blinked slowly. “Er… alright. But why?”

****

“Because no one else on base has quite the same level of patience for Scout’s restlessness.” Spy piped up.

****

Scout bristled at the remark. He didn’t like what it might imply. Not that it implied anything _directly_ , of course. But what if…

****

Sniper genuinely hadn’t noticed Spy was there. He tried not to shudder.

****

“That’s an awful rude thing to say there.” Sniper growled lowly instead.

****

Spy grimaced.

****

“Now you’re both totally right. I’m a handful, Spy’s a rude bitch, now let’s blow this place.” Scout said quickly, grabbing Sniper by the arm and pulling him out of the room. While he’d love to see Sniper kick Spy’s ass, he worried that Spy might say something else...implicative if they stayed there much longer.

****

“Let’s go do somethin’ fun. C’mon.” Scout said, pulling Sniper along in the general direction of the parking lot.

****

“I’m afraid I don’t have the foggiest clue what’s going on.” Sniper said calmly, letting himself be dragged along and trying his best to keep up.

****

“Y’know, me neither? But let’s go.” Scout said, forgetting for the moment that he was supposed to feel nervous around Sniper.

****

“Where are we goin’? Like, where specifically in town?” Sniper asked, stepping around a large rock to avoid taking a tumble.

****

“We can figure that out when we get there. It’ll be more fun that way.” Scout said, flashing Sniper a grin over his shoulder.

****

Sniper felt a warmth in his chest at that, which reassured him. “Okay, then.”

****

They arrived at the parking lot soon enough, and Scout lead the way to his scooter. He took his helmet and handed Sniper the spare. He usually kept both helmets in his room, but it seemed he’d left them both on his bike the last time he’d gone for a ride. Weird.

****

Scout buckled his own helmet while Sniper just looked turned his over in his hands, looking at it curiously.

****

“You’ve never been on my bike before, have ya, Stretch?” Scout asked, twinkle in his eye, as  he gave Sniper a playful punch in the arm.

****

“... can’t say I have, come to think of it.” Sniper said, removing his hat to don the helmet. He buckled it and saw his reflection in the chrome on the side of the scooter. He frowned. The helmet looked a little funny on him, but hey, safety first.

****

“I won’t let nothin’ happen, just hold on tight.” Scout said, sitting down on the bike and starting it up. He scooched forward a bit to make room and looked at Sniper expectantly.

Sniper, hat still in hand, sat behind Scout and put one hand on the either side of Scout’s waist.

****

It was then that Sniper realized his crotch was dangerously close to Scout’s ass. He shifted how he sat… he knew what might happen if the road got bumpy.

****

Scout accelerated suddenly, making Sniper yelp inelegantly and grab Scout’s waist tighter.

****

Scout chortled and pulled out onto the main road.

****

“If you crash, I’m literally going to kill you”, Sniper spoke up over the roar of the engine.

****

“I’ll be waitin’ for you outside Respawn.” Scout quipped back.

****

The ride continued and Sniper got more comfortable with the concept of being on a vehicle with no walls zipping down the street at nearly a hundred kilometers per hour and was actually able to enjoy the scenery. Scout was a (surprisingly?) good driver, and the idea of him controlling a machine with so much speed and power was… kinda hot, for lack of a better term.

****

Sniper scooched backwards a bit.

****

When they got into town, Scout pulled into a municipal lot. They left their helmets on the scooter and started walking down the main street. Sniper carded his fingers through his hair before putting his hat back on.

****

“So”, he began, grinning, “between all that runnin’ you do and ridin’ on your bike, how many bugs do you think you swallow in a week?”

****

Scout snorted. “That’s just gross, man.”

****

“Figure a scrawny fella like you needs the protein.” Sniper chuckled.

****

“I betcha anything’s okay if you put enough ketchup on it.” Scout said, shrugging.

****

Sniper smiled and shook his head.

****

They sort of just wandered through the town square, meandering down the street, chatting and laughing.

****

“Hey, I dunno how often you come into this town ‘sides when we’re shoppin’ with Engie, but you gotta keep a low profile, Stretch. You’re lookin’ like you’re waitin’ for someone to pop out and jump us.” Scout said, voice low.

****

Sniper raised an eyebrow. “You’re worried about me lookin’ suspicious? You’re the one carrying a switchblade, mate.”

****

Scout’s eyes widened in surprise. “How’d you know?”

****

“Recognized the outline of it in your front pocket.” Sniper said simply.

****

Scout stopped in his tracks right in front of an alley, between the florist’s and the bookstore. Sniper stopped, too. Scout popped up onto his tiptoes to get eye level with Sniper. “You were lookin’ at my front pocket, huh?” Scout asked, wiggling his eyebrows and sporting a shit-eating grin.

****

Sniper reddened and put a hand over his face, caught totally off guard. “I wasn’t lookin--”

****

“I gotcha there for a second, though, didn’t I?” Scout cut in, wiggling his eyebrows again.

****

“Shut the hell up.” Sniper murmured, looking away.

****

The moment was ruined when the two heard faint cursing coming from the alley. They went quiet and observed a fortyish guy in a white apron muttering to himself while going through some crates. He threw a clipboard on the ground then angrily grabbed an object from one of the crates, and whipped it backwards, over his shoulder.

****

Instinctively, Sniper extended an arm and caught the object. He and Scout looked at it for a second.

****

It was a bouquet of flowers.

****

Magnolias, to be precise.

****

“Nice catch”, Scout said appraisingly.

****

Sniper lowered his arm and inspected the flowers-- sturdy, large white petals with just the faintest tint of pink.

****

The florist turned around, embarrassed there had been witnesses to his little tantrum. “Sorry about that”, he said, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. “First of all, I ordered _white roses,_ right? And they were supposed to come at six _a.m_ not six _p.m_. But why should I ever get the right delivery?” He made a noise that was a combination of a laugh and a sigh.

****

Scout and Sniper exchanged glances. Sniper moved to give back the bouquet.

****

The florist waved him off. “Keep it”, he said. He studied the duo for a split second and smiled. “You two make a lovely couple.”

****

Both Scout and Sniper opened their mouths to refute that claim, but before they could even say a word, the florist spoke again.

****

“Do either of you know the language of the flowers?” He asked with kind amusement.

****

“Didn’t even know they could talk.” Scout said, only half-serious, lightly poking a flower petal.

****

The florist laughed. “The magnolia flower symbolizes true love-- the kind of love that transcends time and space. True, pure love.”

****

Sniper, cheeks tinted, mumbled “Thanks for the flowers. But--”

****

“--we better get goin’.” Scout finished, similarly flushed.

****

“Of course!” The florist said, laughing. “I don’t want to keep you from your date. You kids have fun, now.” He waved goodbye then turned back to rummaging through the crates of flowers.

****

Scout and Sniper turned back down the street.

****

“So what are you gonna do with those?” Scout asked, pointing to the bouquet Sniper still held.

****

“No idea. Could hardly bring ‘em back on your bike-- wind’d blow the petals off.”

****

“We’ll think of somethin’.”

****

After a moment of quiet, Scout asked excitedly, “Wait, was that guy right? Is it six o’clock already?”

****

Sniper looked at his watch. “Erm, yeah. ‘s ten past, actually. Why?”

****

“Then let’s get us some supper!” Scout declared triumphantly.

****

“I’d ask where, but I know better than that now.” Sniper said, amused. Scout’s spontaneity might’ve thrown him for a loop earlier, but now he could appreciate the appeal of not planning everything to death.

****

“Bingo! Now you’re gettin’ it.” Scout laughed.

****

Sniper laughed in return.

****

The next time they rounded a corner, Scout pointed to an inconspicuous, medium-sized brick building with a sign that read “North Street Pub”.

****

“Wanna go there?” He asked.

****

“Sure.” Sniper agreed, and they crossed the street and entered the restaurant.

****

The dining area was a bit bigger than it looked from the outside, yet most of the tables were filled. It looked like some pub/family dining establishment hybrid, with wood-paneled floors and walls but bunches of purple heather flowers in the little vases on the tables.

****

They sat themselves in a corner booth and immediately picked up the menus and began looking for what to eat.

****

After a minute, Scout lowered his menu just enough to peek at Sniper.

****

“Hey”, Scout began, and Sniper could practically hear him grinning.

****

“Hmm?” Sniper asked, looking up from his menu.

****

“D’you think this place serves bugs? ‘Cause I got a craving.”

****

Sniper stifled a smile. He looked at a dead fly on the windowsill. “Probably not on purpose. But order something nice and crunchy, like a beetle.”

****

Scout clamped a hand over his mouth to muffle his laughter. “You’re frickin’ gross, pal.”

****

Sniper laughed. “You started it, though.”

****

Before Scout could retort, the waitress arrived to take their drink orders. Coke for Scout, decaf black coffee for Sniper.

****

The waitress looked from Sniper, to Scout, to the small bouquet of magnolias Sniper had left on the table.

****

“Are you two here for the Couples Night? Tonight we’re having a mixer for different couples to meet and socialize. In about forty-five minutes, actually.” She said, smiling.

****

Scout and Sniper looked at the waitress like deer caught in headlights.

****

“Because if you are here for the Couple’s Night, you get ten percent off your meal.” The waitress continued.

****

“Yeah, we’re totally here for that!” Scout piped up.

****

“Okay, cool.” The waitress said, still smiling, and headed into the kitchen.

****

Sniper was going to ask if Scout was serious, but sensing this, Scout spoke first.

****

“We get a discount, right? So let’s have fun with this.” Scout said smiling, though with a nervous edge to his voice.

****

“Sure, why not?” Sniper said casually.

****

A minute later, the waitress returned with their drinks then took their dinner orders. They each ordered a burger and fries-- hardly the meal choice for a romantic date.

****

“So as long as we’re havin’ fun with this”, Sniper began, voice low.

****

“Yeah?” Scout asked, interest piqued.

****

“Later, when we’re talking with the other… couples? I bet I can embarrass you more than you can embarrass me.” Sniper smiled smugly and took a sip of his coffee. A strong competitive streak was something he and Scout had in common. Any chance there was to turn something into a friendly competition, they would take it.

****

Scout shamelessly stole a couple french fries from Sniper’s plate. “You wanna make it official?” He asked, rising to the challenge. He extended a hand.

****

“It’s a bet.” Sniper said, and they shook on it.

****

He ended up putting the bouquet of magnolias in the table vase with the heather.

****

They payed for the meal (after a lot of back and forth, they had decided to go dutch), and sure enough, at seven o’clock, a woman in a blazer strode to the center of the room and clapped her hands to get everyone’s attention. She announced that the Couple’s Night was now officially starting, and encouraged everyone to have fun and make new friends. Some of the waitstaff appeared and pushed some tables towards the walls to make more space in the room.

****

And then the night could begin.

****

“So, let me get this straight. People come here looking for other couples to double date with?” Sniper murmured, suddenly regretting making the bet and feeling rather content to just stay by the wall.

****

“Yeah. Basically. So let’s be that nightmare couple no one would want to hang out with.” Scout said quietly.

****

“ ‘Cause I’m sure if we were honest, everyone would be chompin’ at the bit to hang out with two hired killers.” Sniper said, voice dripping with sarcasm. He gave an exaggerated wink.

****

Scout smiled. “Absolutely. Let’s knock ‘em dead.”

****

They hung around in a spot that wasn’t quite the center of the room but wasn’t quite the edge either.

****

It didn’t take very long for them to be approached by another couple-- two people in maybe their mid-thirties, a man and a woman. They introduced themselves as real estate agents from Prescott who happened to be passing through.

****

Scout stifled a grin. “Yeah, my name’s John, I’m a stripper. This is my boyfriend Phil, he’s a certified Elvis impersonator. We met in Vegas.”

****

Sniper had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing.

****

The other couple made polite conversation for another minute before excusing themselves the first chance they got.

****

“D’you think I could really pass for an Elvis impersonator?” Sniper asked, amused. He decided deliberately to not bring up Scout’s “job”. They could flirt about that later.

****

Scout laughed. “Nah. You don’t really look like a ‘Phil’, either.”

****

“Well, I think it was a good first attempt.” Sniper teased.

****

“Y’think you could do better, smart guy?” Scout challenged, all smiles.

****

“Yeah, I do.” Sniper said matter-of-factly. It would be sort of difficult to try to top Scout’s claim of being a stripper, but if Scout could improvise so much, then Sniper could, too.

****

They politely approached the next nearest couple-- well dressed, although they looked a little lost and confused. Probably had just walked into the pub of the street to see what all the hubbub was about. Perfect.

****

Sniper tipped his hat. “Hey, I’m Hank, and this is my boyfriend George. We’re both salesmen; I sell life insurance and he sells custom bowling balls.”

****

“How charming”, one of the other couple said, giving a pathetic attempt for a fake smile.

****

“We met while tryin’ to rob the same person in an alleyway.” Sniper deadpanned.

****

Scout doubled over in laughter despite trying very hard not to.

The other couple left immediately.

****

“Was that good?” Sniper asked, smiling.

****

“Wasn’t bad.” Scout said, nodding appraisingly. “But you shoulda known that no one is better than me when it comes to makin’ a scene.”

****

“In hindsight? Probably.” Sniper agreed.

****

Scout snorted.

****

The charade deepened as the night wore on, with both Scout and Sniper delivering increasingly embarrassing scenarios and fake names. At one point, they pretended to be a newlywed couple and really hammed it up, talking about decorating their new house and even pretending to argue about it.

****

The need to outdo each other had gradually dissipated and they eventually gave up on the bet entirely, choosing to just joke and laugh with each other instead.

****

They had decided to leave a little after eight o’clock, what with the long drive back from this particular town and there being battle the next day and all.

****

During the long walk back to Scout’s scooter (they had wandered maybe a solid fifteen minutes away), Sniper looked down to see that he and Scout were holding hands, fingers laced together. He genuinely hadn’t noticed, not that he minded. It was nice. It felt right.

****

He wondered if he had been the one to take Scout’s hand, or if it had been the other way around.

****

The ride back to base went about the same as the ride into town, only this time, Sniper felt comfortable from the get-go.

****

“So”, Sniper began, voice barely audible over the roar of the road. “Who do you think won the bet?”

****

“Honestly? I dunno. But it was fun, huh?” Scout gave a cheeky smile.

****

“Yeah”, Sniper agreed, “it was.”

****

They continued talking for the remainder of the drive. Sniper had never been a talkative guy, but he really enjoyed talking with Scout and had realized a long time ago that they could have a conversation about just about anything. And generally, they did. But when there was silence between them, it was almost never uncomfortable, and rather more of an amiable quiet.

****

It was nearly ten and night was in full swing when Scout pulled into the base’s parking a lot.

Sniper’s legs felt funny after being on the bike for so long, and his joints groaned in protest as he stood.

****

Neither spoke for a minute as they walked back to base. As usual, though, Scout broke the silence.

****

“I’m sorry I dragged ya out today without any real warnin’. That wasn’t cool.” Scout said, head down.

****

“I’d have said ‘no’ if I didn’t want to go, mate. I told you, I had fun.” Sniper chuckled. “I always have fun when we go out.”

****

Scout looked up, brightening. “Yeah?”

****

“Yeah.” Sniper nodded.

****

The happy silence resumed.

****

They were nearly at the base, and Sniper was about to bid goodnight and go back to his camper, when Scout spoke again.

****

“Y’know, man, you’re the only person I’ve met who has coffee at night? It’s different.” Scout said, looking up at Sniper in earnest.

****

“I just like it, is all. ‘Sides, it’s only decaf.” Sniper said, a mite defensively. As a matter of fact, he almost always just had decaf coffee. Caffeine jitters don’t make for good precision shooting.

****

“Nah, nah, I just thought it was, like, _interesting_ different, not _weird_ different.” Scout said quickly, blushing.

****

Sniper smiled. He found it endearing, how Scout could go from shameless flirt to shy and nervous. It was adorable.

****

It was a clear night and the full moon was out and bright, casting a soft, pale light over the duo. Sniper looked up to take in the night sky. He whistled low. “Would you look at that, though”, he said softly. No matter how many times he looked up at the sky over the badlands, he always found it impressive. When he first took up this job, he had been relieved to see the endless array of stars. It was wonderfully reminiscent of home.

****

Scout craned his neck skyward. A lack of light pollution wasn’t a luxury he was afforded growing up in the city. His jaw had hit the floor the first time he saw night fall over the desert. Sure, he knew there were plenty of stars out there, but he’d had no idea it was _this many_. Thousands upon thousands of little white speckles just suspended up there. The scenery may have been sublime, but the open wonder with which Sniper looked up at the sky literally took Scout’s breath away. The way his eyes shown, the way he beamed, made Scout feel all warm and tingly inside.

****

Scout couldn’t stop himself from lunging forward as a surge of emotion went through him. He fisted one hand in Sniper’s shirt, pulling him down a scoche to his level. With his other hand, he cupped the side of Sniper’s face.

****

And then he kissed him.

****

Taken by surprise as he was, Sniper didn’t hesitate for a second in returning the affection, and began kissing Scout right back. He slipped his arms around the other man and pulled him closer.

****

They stayed like that for a time, soft, sweet kisses, lips sliding together oh so naturally. Though it wasn’t long before their kissing intensified, and they were soon making out outright. Scout tangled his fingers in the hair on the back of Sniper’s head, and Sniper’s hand slipped down to Scout’s lower back.

****

It was supremeless. A lovely give-and-take. Sniper luxuriated in the novelty of the situation, head spinning.

****

When they parted, Sniper, grin on crooked, smoothed the front of his shirt. He was trying to think of something witty or suave to say, when he took in the sight of Scout.

****

Scout had been smiling too, but now his eyes were wide and he looked very, very nervous. Skittish, more like. “ _Oh shit._ ” He said softly, and promptly took off into the base like he’d forgotten he’d left the stove on, door slamming behind him.

****

Sniper stood there a minute, frozen, hurt, confused. When he collected himself, he began the slow walk back to his camper, heart heavy.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry that was so long,,,
> 
> btw, the flower symbolism for heather: fulfillment of secret passions, secret longings, the call of the heart :^)
> 
> have a nice day! <3


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Closure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hoo hoo hoo this is a frickin monster of a chapter. we're just gonna pretend that I planned for each chapter to gradually become longer, ok?

Wednesday night.

****

Poker night.

****

Every Wednesday night, like clockwork, Engie, Demo, and Sniper would gather around a crappy foldable table in Engie’s garage to play cards, drink beer, and shoot the breeze. 

****

They would stay up as late as they could justify on a work night, and share stories and dumb jokes. It was generally a highlight of Sniper’s week.

****

Not tonight, though. His mind was somewhere else entirely. 

****

It was not out of the ordinary for Sniper to zone out, but this was starting to get ridiculous.

****

“Mate”, Demo said, snapping his fingers in front of Sniper’s face.

****

No response.

****

“Aye, mate!” Demo said, a little louder.

****

No response again.

****

“MATE”, he basically shouted.

****

“Hmm?” Sniper asked, snapping back to reality.

****

Engie guffawed. Demo sighed.

****

“You were pretty gone for a good minute there, Stretch”, Engie laughed, putting down his cards.

****

“Really?” Sniper asked, embarrassed.

****

“Yeah, it’s like ye haven’t been here all night.” Demo nodded.

****

“Oh. Erm. Sorry.” Sniper said, punctuating the sentence with nervous laughter.

****

“What’s eatin’ you?” Engie asked, concerned.

****

Sniper opened his mouth to say something, but Demo raised a finger to shush him. “An’ don’t say nothing’s wrong because we all know that’s a load of shite.” Demo gave him a challenging look.

****

Sniper relented, only because protesting this would drag the whole situation out. He gave a sharp exhale and leaned back in the uncomfortable metal folding chair. 

****

He closed his eyes so he wouldn’t have to see the worry on his friend’s faces. He loathed people fretting over him. “I just had a… falling out, with someone. It’s nothing, really.”

****

It was absolutely not “nothing”. It had been over a week since he and Scout’s quasi-date, and in the time since, they had gone above and beyond in the attempts to avoid each other. They went out of their way to not be in the same room if it could be helped, and if it couldn’t, then they wouldn’t even look at each other. Team meals became a lot less fun. The general atmosphere around base seemed to suffer as well.

****

It was damn heart-breaking, is what it was.

****

“Ye mean you and Scout had a falling out. It really  _ is okay  _ to tell us things, you know.” Demo said, eyebrow raised.

****

Sniper was a little surprised. “Why’re you askin’ me if it seems you already know?” He asked, taking a sip of his beer.

****

“Weren’t hard to see that the dynamic duo was broken up, we was just hopin’ to hear about it from one of you.” Engie said.

****

“Fair enough, I suppose.” Sniper said, feeling a wave of some unidentifiable unpleasant emotion wash over him.

****

“It’s not out of the ordinary for couples to have little spats. Whatever happened to you two, are you sure you can’t just talk about it?” Engie asked.

****

Sniper sputtered, certain he had heard wrong. “Beg your pardon?”

****

“Engie’s right. Lover’s quarrels happen all the time, but we all thought you and Scout made such a nice couple. What happened?” Demo said, concerned. 

****

The realization of what they were talking about hit Sniper like a ton of bricks. He turned bright red. “Scout and I are  _ not  _ dating.” He said, hands raised defensively.

****

“Ach, no! When did ye break up?” Demo asked, in disbelief.

****

“We never broke up because we never started dating to begin with.” Sniper said levely, very proud he didn’t let any bitterness or sadness seep into his tone. 

****

Sniper got up from the metal folding chair (which was just starting to make his ass hurt) and politely excused himself. “Goodnight.” He mumbled, leaving the garage to head back to his camper.

****

“I still think they’re datin’.” Engie said, looking at the door Sniper had just left through.

****

“Oh, absolutely.” Demo agreed.

****

They went back to the card game. 

****

Back in his van, Sniper flopped face down on the bed and inhaled deeply. 

****

He was lying down for a solid ten minutes and on the verge of falling asleep when his radio buzzed. 

****

Exactly two people would bother him that late at night, and he wasn’t really on speaking terms with one of them. 

****

The voice crackled over the radio. “Hey Sniper? It’s Pauling. I’ve got a job for you.”

****

He got down from his bed and snatched the radio off the table. He pressed the ‘talk’ button. “Yeah, ‘s me. What’ve you got?”

****

“Oh, hey. Good thing you’re a night owl, I’m glad I caught you. Listen, I need something done quickly, efficiently, and quietly.” Miss Pauling said.

****

So far so good. Some extra work would take his mind off things. “Alright. Got any details?”

****

“Now I know, short notice and all, but the target is moving into position sooner than expected and I’ll need this done on Saturday. And I guess it’s technically a double contract? I mean, in the sense that I’m sending both you and Scout on this one.”

****

Of course. Why should anything ever go right for Sniper? He bit the inside of his cheek. “Why do you need two people?”

****

“It’s just the nature of this particular job. And, well, you guys work good together. I gotta go, but I’ll give you more information tomorrow. Have a good one.” Miss Pauling said.

****

“You too.” Sniper mumbled, putting down the radio.

****

He flopped on the bed again and closed his eyes.

****

He didn’t have a good sleep that night. It was more like the kind of sleep where you blink and next thing you know, it’s morning. 

****

Sniper was shaved, dressed, and ready to head to breakfast within twenty minutes. 

****

As per usual, he was the first person there. He had time to make a pot of coffee and make some toast before the rest of the team started filing in. 

****

Breakfast was never the most exciting team meal, with most of the team still being half asleep. It was not advisable to even  _ look  _ at Medic before he had his coffee.

****

Some of the team had received some letters in the mail, and were kind enough to read them out loud for everyone. Just hearing news from someone’s family, even if it wasn’t their own, did wonders to help with the mercs’ morale and homesickness. 

****

Sniper had been long since ready to leave the table, but he wasn’t about to get up in the middle of someone’s story. That would just be rude. It was lovely to hear that Engie’s dad was in the midst of some cool new project and that Heavy’s sisters had sent over a giant box of baked goodies for the team, but Sniper just wanted to start prepping for the day’s battle already and get it over with. 

****

Sniper realized he must’ve zoned out again when he noticed that everyone else had cleared out of the building.

****

Well, maybe not  _ everyone _ . There was the sound of a faucet running and dishes clattering from within the kitchen, as well someone whistling an old Elvis tune.

****

“All Shook Up”, if Sniper recalled.

****

Sniper stepped into the kitchen to give his plate and mug to whoever the hell’s turn it was for dish duty.

****

An apron-clad Scout, sponge in hand, stopped his scrubbing and whistling when he heard footsteps behind him. Sniper silently slipped his dishes into the sink. 

****

Scout pretended to be very fascinated by the wall in front of him.

****

“Scout.” Sniper said calmly.

****

Scout remained silent, a feat some might consider impossible for him.

****

Sniper had had enough.

****

“Oh no, we are going to talk about this.” Sniper said, grabbing Scout by the apron strings and turning him around to face him.

****

Scout gulped. “... uh. I mean, yeah, I figured, like, we’d have to eventually, ‘specially before that contract comin’ up-- did Miss P talk to you about that? I’m assumin’ she radioed you last night too, right? And I was thinkin’ we oughta talk about this, I didn’t mean to be puttin’ it off, neither, but--” He rattled on a mile a minute, gesturing quite a bit.

****

Sniper raised an eyebrow. “You’re stalling, mate.”

****

Scout sighed, raking a still-wet hand through his hair. Sniper saw right through him. He always did. “Okay, okay. Ya got me. Let’s talk.”

****

Neither said anything for a minute, each waiting for the other to speak.

****

“So”, Sniper began, not sure he wanted to know the answer, “why’d you run off?”

****

Scout took off the apron and left it on the counter. He took a second to think about how he was going to phrase his answer.

****

“We been good friends for like a wicked long time, right? And I knew there was kinda sorta maybe somethin’ goin’ on between us but I didn’t want to screw it up with my dumb feelings and whateva. Then that psychic lady said that thing about us bein’  _ soulmates _ and I was tryin’ not to let it get to me-- but then there were all those… coincidences? Would you call ‘em? First that thing with the cookies, then the flowers…” Scout trailed off, looking somewhere off to the left. 

****

Scout bit the bullet and looked Sniper straight in the eye. “Then when we had that dinner and pretended we were a couple and everything, I realized, just--  _ fuck _ \-- I realized exactly how much I liked the idea of us datin’. The point, I guess, is that I was afraid of how much I like you and everythin’ that means..”

****

Sniper stuffed his hands into his pockets and leaned back against the wall. “You wanna talk about bein’ worried you were gonna mess up? I just spent the last week and a half thinking I’d screwed up and lost my best mate.”

****

Scout bit his lip. “Y’know you didn’t though, right?”

****

Sniper cocked his head. “And you know I wouldnt’ve kissed you back if I wasn’t interested, right?”

****

“... yeah.” Scout mumbled, reddening. “ And I am  _ so _ ,  _ so  _ sorry I ran out on you--  it wasn’t fair to not give you no explanation, neither. I guess there’s a lot we gotta figure out.”

****

“If what the psychic said is true and we  _ are  _ soulmates, that just means we have all of forever to figure things out, then. There’s no reason we can’t do things in our own time, in our own way. You’re the one who always wants to ‘go with the flow’.” Sniper shrugged. 

****

Scout grinned. “Hey, that’s a good point! No reason we gotta jump into things too soon.”

****

A thought flashed through Sniper’s mind. He checked his watch. “Bugger”, he mumbled, “we got ten minutes before the fight starts.”

****

“Damn.” Scout muttered. “We’ll talk later though?” He asked, beaming.

****

“Of course.” Sniper gave a nod, smiling.

 

 

* * *

 

****

 

Per Miss Pauling’s request, Sniper and Scout took the bread truck when they left in the waning hours of Friday night. They had loaded up the back with their gear and other equipment, and they were ready to go.

 

Sniper was driving, with Scout in the passenger seat. Scout had a map spread out over his lap and a flashlight in hand.

 

Sniper stifled a yawn. “I’m gonna need you to keep talking, mate, to help me stay awake.”

 

Scout laughed in surprise. “Nobody’s actually  _ asked  _ me to talk before. You sure you don’t want to just take turns driving?”

 

Sniper smiled. “I’m sure. When was the last time you drove a car, anyway?”

 

Scout shrugged. “I stole a car when I was 19-- does that count? I hotwired it, it was cool as hell.”

 

“That’s what I meant. You’ve got good stories, and you should never be behind the wheel of a car.” Sniper said. “That’s why I’m driving.”

 

“Wait-- you like my stories?” Scout asked, face lighting up.

 

“Yeah, and I’m pretty sure I’ve told you as much before, don’t see what the big surprise is. By the way, did you get a letter from home? Didn’t recall you sharing one at breakfast.” Sniper said.

 

“Nah, I didn’t get to read mine out loud, but it was a wicked funny one from one of my brothers. Apparently, this kid we went to school with? Couple weeks ago, he was drivin’, makin’ a packie run, and he was already loaded, right? And it was gonna be trash day so all the barrels were on the curb, and this guy is tryin’ to bang a uey through this parking lot but accidentally knocked over  _ all of ‘em.  _ The cops had a speed trap around the corner and came over to see what was goin’ on, the guy comes outta the car, and y’know what?” Scout had to pause multiple times just to restrain his giggles.

 

“What?” Sniper asked, trying to parse out what Scout was talking about.

 

“The cops get the guy to go outta the car, and they say ‘Sir, are you drunk?’. And this guy-- he says  _ with a beer in his cup holder _ \-- ‘Nah, I ain’t drunk, I haven’t even gotten to the packie yet’!” Scout outright guffawed, wiping a tear from the corner of his eye.

 

Sniper chuckled, but still looked at Scout expectantly.

 

“Dude got stopped for drunk drivin’ on his way to the liquor store.” Scout explained a little sheepishly. “I guess it’s funnier if you know the guy.”

 

“Well, it’s still funny. I had a laugh.” He half-shrugged.

 

“D’you have a good story, then? Okay, wait, here’s a question: What’s somethin’ embarrassin’ that happened to you? I gotta know.” Scout asked eagerly.

 

Sniper scratched his chin in thought. “Well I don’t know how embarassin’ it was, but…”

 

“Please tell me, I gotta know. I embarrass myself like it’s a full time job, I wanna know what you’ve gotten into.” Scout was basically bouncing in his seat. 

 

Sniper sighed. “When I was a lad, I was visiting some family in the city one spring. I was goofin’ off, runnin’ down the sidewalk. And outta nowhere, these two magpies swoop down from a tree and start peckin’ and scratchin’ at me. I got away, and ran back to my aunt and uncle’s house with my face all bloody, yellin’ about those damn birds. They had a good laugh, told me about how territorial magpies get in nesting season-- I hadn’t known that, living way out in the middle of nowhere. That was embarrassing, I suppose.”

 

Scout wrinkled his nose. “You got attacked by frickin  _ birds _ ? Man, that sucks. I don’t know where I was expectin’ you to go with that, but it wasn’t there. Did they leave a mark or somethin’?”

 

Sniper shook his head. “Nah, fortunately. But I have plenty of other scars from plenty of other things.”

 

Scout put a hand on Sniper’s bicep and batted his eyelashes up at him. “Y’think you could show me sometime?”

 

Sniper didn’t shy away. “I reckon so, if you’d be willing to do the same”, he said with a wink.

“Oh, I’d be willin’ alright.” Scout replied with an exaggerated eyebrow wiggle.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

Mission accomplished. 

 

A little worse for wear and sufficiently bumped and bruised, the duo began the drive to the motel. It was ten-thirty at night, and some rest was definitely in order. 

 

But not quite yet.

 

“I could totally drive if I wanted to, it ain’t hard. I have a license and everything. ‘Sides, you’ve seen me drive my scooter, and it went fine!” Scout said, just a touch whiny.

 

“A bread truck is a lot bigger than a scooter.” Sniper said simply.

 

“Yeah, but--” Scout’s attempt to argue his point further was stopped when he glanced down at the map. “Oh fuck, Oak Street, turn right.”

 

They were nearly past it, so when Sniper made the turn, the back of the truck swerved a bit and nearly hit a pole. 

 

Scout gave a smug grin. “Ace driving, Stretch”, he said sarcastically.

 

Sniper rolled his eyes, not the least bit offended. “When’s the next turn?” He asked, ignoring the comment.

 

“In a minute maybe, left onto Desert Drive.” Scout said, tracing the path on the map with his finger.

 

Scout was right, and it wasn’t long after the turn that they pulled into the motel parking lot. 

 

They grabbed their stuff, double-checked that they looked presentable (they had changed into civilian clothes after fulfilling the contract-- getting other people’s blood on your clothes will necessitate that) and entered the building. 

 

An elderly man was dozing at the front desk, head propped up on his arm. 

 

“ ‘Scuse me? Sir?” Scout asked gently.

 

The man woke with a start and quickly adjusted all the papers on the desk. “Yes, hello! How can I help you?” He smiled pleasantly. 

 

“We’d like two rooms, please.” Sniper said.

 

The man leafed through a ledger. He looked up with a frown. “Sorry, I’m afraid we only have one room left, we’re pretty overbooked. Would you mind sharing?

 

Scout and Sniper exchanged looks. 

 

“That should be fine.” Scout said, and Sniper nodded.

 

The old man smiled. “Ok, room 105, right down the hall.” He slid a key across the counter.

 

They found the room without any trouble, and no sooner was the door unlocked and light switched on, than a realization hit the duo.

 

There was only one bed.

 

There it was, king-size and decorated with a western-themed bedspread. The whole room was decorated in a moderately tacky western theme, as a matter of fact. 

 

They stood frozen in the doorway for a second.

 

“I call first shower!” Scout declared, digging through his duffel bag.

 

“Fine by me”, Sniper said, sitting on the edge of the bed. He started trying to yank off his right boot.

 

Scout was about to head into the bathroom when he caught sight of a dark red stain on Sniper’s knee.

 

“Are you feelin’ alright there, pal?” Scout asked, concerned.

 

“Yeah, I’m fine. Why do you ask?” Sniper tilted his head in confusion. 

 

“I sure hope that blood ain’t yours, then.” Scout said, pointing to the stain.

 

Sniper looked down, perplexed. He rolled up his pant leg and sure enough, there was blood. And it was his.

 

“Oh. That must’ve been from when I fell.” He said, a little surprised. He didn’t know how he hadn’t noticed the wound itself or the warm blood that had trickled down his leg.

“Does it hurt?” Scout asked worriedly.

 

“Stings a mite, but it shouldn’t be a problem.” Sniper shrugged. 

 

“You go take the first shower and get that cleaned up. How are we gonna--”

 

“I packed a first aid kit, it should be in my bag.” Sniper said, rifling through his bag. He withdrew the kit and left it on the bed for later.

 

Sniper emerged from the shower fifteen minutes later, hair wet and slicked back, dressed in a undershirt and boxer shorts. 

 

Scout gulped, blushing.

 

“Erm, sorry. I usually sleep in the buff, I don’t own real pyjamas. And I thought we’d be sleepin’ in our own rooms, so…” Sniper said, purposefully avoiding eye contact and suddenly feeling a bit self-conscious. 

 

“It’s fine.” Scout replied, voice cracking awkwardly. “Just uh, sit down, wouldya? Lemme take a look at that scrape.”

 

“Alright.” Sniper agreed, sitting down on the edge of the bed again.

 

Scout took the first aid kit and kneeled in front of Sniper. He held a gauze pad against Sniper’s knee and set to work wrapping more gauze around it, and used some medical tape to hold it in place.

 

It was just a scrape, nothing bad, and it would probably heal on its own pretty soon. A lot sooner, if Medic could take a look at it. Which Sniper’s pride absolutely would not allow.

 

Sniper had known he could take care of this himself, but Scout had been very keen to help him, so why not? 

 

Sniper realized what the scene probably looked like, with Scout kneeling in front of him like that. Scout must’ve realized this too, because when he paused in his work to look up at Sniper, he turned even more red (if that was even possible) and looked back down again immediately.

 

Scout’s whole face had heated up. He had to focus very hard on the task at hand and tried with all his might to not let his eyes wander. It took all his willpower to not just straight-up stare at Sniper’s crotch. It was especially difficult, being in such close proximity and all.

 

Sniper’s knee all taken care of, Scout stood up. “How’s it feel now?” 

 

Sniper flexed and unflexed his leg. The makeshift bandage stayed. “Much better, thank you.” He smiled.

 

“No problem.” Scout said, smiling back. “Just, y’know, be more careful next time.” He nervously fiddled with his hands.

 

“I’ll certainly try.” Sniper replied.

 

A beat of silence. 

 

“Well I’m gonna go shower for real now.” Scout said, picking up his duffel bag and scampering off into the bathroom.

 

The sound of hot water coming through the ancient pipes followed a moment later.

 

Sniper leaned back on the bed for awhile, unsure what to do with himself. The room had a tv, but the only thing on this late would be the news, which he was not particularly interested in. Part of that was worry there’d be news coverage about a couple guys in red shirts burying bodies out in the desert. There hadn’t been any witnesses, but…

 

On the left nightstand was a flyer for a pizza place up the street. Just looking at it was enough to make Sniper’s stomach rumble. He scanned the flyer, the prices looked pretty cheap and they were open until midnight.

 

Sniper looked at the alarm clock on the other nightstand (he had taken off his watch). It was 11:13. 

 

He knocked on the bathroom door. “Mate”, he called over the loud spray of the shower, “y’wanna get a pizza?”

 

“What?” Scout called back. 

 

“Pizza. Yes or no.” Sniper said, a little louder this time.

 

“Fuck yeah, man, you need to ask?” Scout shouted, loud enough that Sniper was worried someone in a neighboring room would come knocking to complain.

 

“What kind do you want?” Sniper asked.

 

“What?” Scout called again.

 

“I said, ‘what kind do you want’.” Sniper said, even louder.

 

“Uh, lemme think. Y’know, this would be a lot easier if you came in here with me.” Scout called. 

 

A pause.

 

Sniper was very glad he was behind the door so Scout couldn’t see how red he turned.

 

“Oh shit-- I meant-- well, you know what I meant.” Scout said, quieter although still audible. The thinly veiled ongoing sexual tension between them had not meant to have been acknowledged.

 

Another pause.

 

“Is pepperoni okay?” Scout asked. He knew it was Sniper’s favorite.

 

“Yeah. I’ll go call in the order.” Sniper said. He went over to the phone in the room, and did just that.

 

Scout came out of the bathroom a few minutes later in an old t-shirt and flannel pajama pants that were adorably too long.

 

Scout threw himself onto the bed then spread out like a starfish. 

 

Sniper chuckled.

 

Scout propped his head up with his hand. “I know this is comin’ out of left field, but, like, what if we saw that psychic lady again on the drive back home? Just for shits and giggles.”

 

Sniper thought it funny although not incorrect, referring to the team’s base as ‘home’. He then took a second to mull over Scout’s actual question. “We could do that, yeah. It’s just a matter of gettin’ off at a different exit.” Sniper had definitely considered going back and talking to the psychic more about his and Scout’s… situation. Besides, there was no real time they were supposed to return by, just preferably before battle on Monday.

 

“Okay, cool.” Scout said, sitting up and scooching over so Sniper had more room to sit.

 

They sat in relative, amiable silence until the pizza arrived.

 

The room unfortunately lacked a table, so Scout and Sniper sat criss-cross applesauce across from each other on the bed. 

 

While they ate their pizza, they joked and gossiped like kids at a sleepover. 

 

“ … and I knew it was a bad idea because  _ Soldier  _ told me it was a bad idea, but I still did it, so yeah, that’s how I found out I shouldn’t slide down the garbage chute just because I can fit in there.” Scout said, gesturing with a half-eaten slice of pizza. 

“Generally, how well does being that impulsive work for you?” Sniper asked, unable to restrain his giggles.

 

Scout shrugged. “Can’t tell you off the top of my head, I’ve never stopped to think about it.” He grinned.

 

Sniper laughed and shook his head. He opened the pizza box. “You want the last slice?” He offered.

 

“Nah, I’m full. Thanks, though.” Scout said.

 

Sniper took the last slice and put the box on top of the trash can.

 

He sat back down and brushed all the crumbs off the bed. Gotta keep it classy.

 

Scout watched him with a furrowed brow. “You’re thinkin’ about somethin’, I can tell.” He said, moving a bit closer. “You always get this look on your face when you’re thinkin’ about somethin’.”

 

Sniper turned to look at him, and there was so much warmth in his expression, Sniper felt himself melt. No use beating around the bush with this one. “I was talkin’ to a couple of the other blokes a few days ago. Did you know the team thinks we’re dating?” He asked, punctuating it with a soft laugh.

 

“For real?” Scout asked, laughing in disbelief. “That just makes things easier, then.”

 

“What do you mean?” Sniper asked, head cocked. 

 

Scout shrugged. “We could, like, prove them right.” His cheeks flushed. “If you wanted to, that is.”

 

Sniper’s eyes widened. Was he hearing this right? His heart sped up in his chest. “Erm, sure. Yes, I mean. Let’s go out.” He cringed internally at his awkwardness. 

 

“ ‘Cause, I know us, and we’ll keep spinnin’ in circles like we been doin’, but I can’t take not bein’ with you for another day.” Scout said, conviction trailing into bashfulness as the sentence ended.

 

Sniper turned fire engine red. “... I feel the same.” He paused. “So, we’re going to be proper and official about it?”

“Yeah”, Scout nodded, beaming.

 

“Alright. Swell.” Sniper said, smiling in return.

 

Later, with teeth brushed and bags ready for a quick exit in the morning, they climbed into bed. Sniper had the left side, facing the door. Scout had the right, facing the wall. 

 

“Just so you know, I been told I talk in my sleep.” Scout warned.

 

“No worries, I can sleep through anythin’. I guess it’s fair to warn you, though, I walk in my sleep. It’s been a long time since I did it last, but I just thought you should know.” Sniper said, rolling over onto his side.

 

Scout yawned. “Well, I won’t let you get too far.”

 

“G’night, Scout.” Sniper said softly, smiling.

 

“Night, Snipes.” Scout replied.

 

If Scout did talk in his sleep that night, Sniper didn’t hear him.

 

Sniper woke up to the feeling of a warm and pleasantly solid weight on him. After a moment’s confusion, he realized Scout, still fast asleep, was spooning him from behind. 

 

Scout had his face buried in Sniper’s back, his right arm around Sniper’s middle, and his right leg draped over Sniper’s legs.

 

Getting over the initial surprise of being a human teddy bear, Sniper actually found the embrace very comforting. He could get up now… or pretend to be asleep for a little while longer. 

 

He chose the latter.

 

Some time later, Scout awoke, and judging by the way his body tensed up, Sniper suspected he hadn’t realized what he was doing. Scout very carefully extracted himself and got out of bed.

 

Sniper turned over to look at him and flashed a lazy smile. “Good morning”, he said.

 

Scout felt a flutter in his chest. “Good morning to you too.” He replied. Then promptly ran into the bathroom with his bag to get dressed.

 

Sniper (unwillingly) got out of the nice, warm bed and faced the evil, cooler air of the motel room in order to get dressed himself. He begrudgingly put on the same pair of pants from the night before. The dried blood stain wasn’t  _ that  _ bad, really. It was noticeable, sure, but he’d had worse.

Twenty minutes later, they were checked out of the motel and on the road to Clear Mind Psychic Readings. 

 

It was over two hours before they got there, and it was a good thing that it was pretty much a straight shot, because Scout had fallen asleep holding the map.

 

Sniper parked on the shoulder of the road, and his jaw nearly hit the floor when he saw the building.

 

He gently shook Scout awake. “Hey, Scout, take a look at this”, he said quietly.

 

“Hmm?” Scout asked, waking up and rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. It took him a second to register what he was looking at.

 

They got out of the truck and approached the shop.

 

The previously meticulously painted sign was weatherbeaten and peeling. The door was boarded shut. A window had been partially broken, and Scout peeked in through the jagged glass. All the shelves were there, although they were now empty, save for a substantial coating of dust. Some scraggly-looking plants were trying to grow up through the floor. A small lizard darted out from under a shelf and quickly disappeared out of sight.

 

“We were only here a month ago.” Sniper mumbled, in disbelief.

 

“But it don’t look like anybody’s been here in  _ years _ . I don’t get it.” Scout said.

 

A chilly breeze went through the both of them. Scout shuddered.

 

He got the distinct sensation of being watched.

 

“Let’s get out of here. I don’t like the looks of this place.” Sniper said, scanning the environment.

 

They got back in the truck.

 

It took a couple tries for the engine to turn over, but then they were off.

 

“What happened to the lady, do you think?” Scout asked, leg jiggling.

 

“She was probably just some desert ghost.” Sniper joked, still uneasy.

 

“Yeah, I bet you’re right.” Scout laughed nervously.

 

A long stretch of silence followed.

“So, Snipes, what do we do now?” Scout asked. “Now that we can’t ask that lady what to do.”

 

“I think” Sniper said, thinking back over the events of the last few days, “that we do what we agreed on-- just go with the flow.”

 

“I can dig it.” Scout agreed, nodding.

 

A small pause.

 

“Hey, when we get back to the base, wanna make out again?” Scout asked earnestly, turning to face Sniper.

 

“I’d like that.” Sniper replied, smiling. “You won’t run off again?” He teased.

 

“Oh, no. You ain’t gonna be able to get rid of me, pal.” Scout laughed.

 

“Good. Then it looks like we’re stuck together.” Sniper grinned.

  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and there you have it! the end of the story. as promised, I tried to utilize as many romcom tropes as possible. this is probably the gooiest, most sickeningly sweet and self indulgent thing I've ever written. I really hope you enjoyed! have a nice day!

**Author's Note:**

> this is partially inspired by some post on tumblr that was like 'what if your otp sees a psychic who tells them they're meant to be but they don't believe it. a series of circumstances cause them to change their minds.' it was like a few years ago that I saw that post so I uh don't remember much. 
> 
> also I am so torn because on one hand I want to write deep and meaningful stories that people think about even after they've read them, but on the other I just want to write cute stories that will make other people (and me too heehee) happy. idk.
> 
> as always, thank you for reading! my tf2 tumblr is @teleported-bread if you'd like to say hi!
> 
> pls leave kudos/comment if you enjoyed because that legit fuels me


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